7 Things I've learned in 7 years

It's funny how I was randomly thinking of old accounts and this one pops in my brain. What wow's me even more is that I remember the password. That's what I get for having the same email for everything. Looking back at some of these posts from as long ago as when I was 13 is... it just gives me so many emotions.
Humbling. 
Embarrassing. 
Inspiring.

 I was literally molding myself then into the woman that I am now. For starting this blog and putting some rather personal (and even dark) messages out in the cyber universe for everyone to see is amazing.

 I am happy I've done it and want to continue to do so in these new chapters I have embarked on in my life. I want to start this new chapter by doing what I do best- taking a look at the old and letting that springboard me into the new with a look back at the 7 things I've learned in 7 years since my last blog post.

  7 Things I've learned (and am still learning) in 7 years:

 1. The only relationship that should define you the most is your spiritual one and the one with yourself. 

2. There is beauty in adversity and hardships. 

3. Never look back at something with regrets. (I think i knew this back then too)

 4. There is a beauty in an unwavering spirit. 

5. When you think there not enough more you can take or give or anything- there always is more. 

6. You are exactly where you need to be. 

7. YOU ARE ENOUGH. 

 I think that it's for now. I've done lots of pieces of writing - here and there and want to do so much more now that I am entering into a new chapter of womanhood in my life and I am excited to document the journey. In the spirit of good reflection- I won't take down and previous post whether it applies to my current outlook on life or not since it was a part of me in my journey of who I am, but I will update my stuff about stuff. 

 Keep on trucking bloggers and good people everywhere.

-SJ-

Diddy - Dirty Money - Loving You No More ft. Drake

Love this Song...Diddy got me hooked.

Genuine Only by Ne-Yo

Okay so I never really had a relationship quite like the one I'm in now. I'm not sure if I will look back at this and regret it LOL but he is really great. So everytime I hear this song, It reminds me of us, our relationship and everything we have been through and have yet to face. Together you and me Babe:


We may struggle
We may even very well see hell’s front gates
Don't think that you are alright
Are above making mistakes
Said I'm gonna get on your damn nerves
And you're gonna make me mad
But I believe we can survive all that
Cause a love this good could never be that bad


So may you never know the way
Way that it feels
Feels to be lonely
May you never know one day
When love isn't real
See this stuff to me is genuine only

Maybe in a perfect world
We would get along perfectly
But seeing how this is real life
Sometimes we just wanna be
And I may make you say you wanna leave
Never come back
But I don't
But I believe we can survive all that
Cause a love this good could never be that bad

So may you never know the way
Way that it feels
Feels to be lonely
May you never know one day
When love isn't real
See this stuff to me is genuine only


Said I ain't always gonna like you girl
Said you ain't always gonna like me girl
But you're the only one I want in this world
Let me sing it again
Said I ain't always gonna like you girl
Said you ain't always gonna like me girl
But I love you more than anything in this world


So may you never know the way
Way that it feels
Feels to be lonely
May you never know one day
When love isn't real
See this stuff to me is genuine only
So may you never know the way
Way that it feels
Feels to be lonely
May you never know one day
When love isn't real
See this stuff to me is genuine only

Nicholas Sparks is my hero....

I always love to read books, but Nicholas Sparks..is one bangin ass author. Everytime no matter what I'm going through, no matter what questions I have he has answers. As I get older I appreciate his wisdom more and more. Thank God for people like him. Fahter, dad and husband who's been through enough to tell it like it is.

Here some of my fav quotes, all sprinkled with wisdom:

"You're going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it's always their actions you should judge them by. It's actions, not words, that matter."

"So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday."
(The Notebook)

"Just when you think it can't get any worse, it can. And just when you think it can't get any better, it can."
(At First Sight)

"Sometimes you have to be apart from people you love, but that doesn't make you love them any less. Sometimes you love them more."
(The Last Song)

"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Loves is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It dose not take offense and is not resentful. Love take no pleasure in others people's sins, but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes."
(A Walk to Remember)

"I don't know that love changes. People change. Circumstances change."

"You always have a choice. It's just that some people make the wrong one."
(The Guardian)

"Mom says it's because she has PMS.
Do you even know what that means?
"I'm not a little kid anymore. It means pissed-at- men syndrome"
(The Last Song)

"I have faith that God will show you the answer. But you have to understand that sometimes it takes a while to be able to recognize what God wants you to do. That's how it often is. God's voice is usually nothing more than a whisper, and you have to listen very carefully to hear it. But other times, in those rarest of moments, the answer is obvious and rings as loud as a church bell."
(The Last Song)

"Life, I've learned, is never fair. If they teach anything in schools, that should be it."

"I'd learned that some things are best kept secret." (Dear John)

"Too far-fetched to believe, too obvious to ignore."

"I want all of you, forever, you and me, everyday"

"When people cared about each other, they always found a way to make it work."
(True Believer)

"In the end you should always do the right thing even if it's hard."
(The Last Song)

He often felt that too many people lived their lives acting and pretending,wearing masks and losing themselves in the process."
(The Choice)

"Women are more attuned to feelings than men are, and if they’re not being truthful, more often than not it’s because they think truth might hurt your feelings. But it doesn’t mean they don’t love you."
(At First Sight)


AMAZING.

Breakdown By Daughtry

They hitting my mood on the nail today, so had to quote the whole song...one of my faves.

Open up the book you beat me with again.
Read it off one sentence at a time.
I'm tired of all the lines,
Convictions and your lies.
What right do you have to point at me?

Well, I'm sitting alone thinking about it all over coffee.
And still crowdin' my space are the things you still hold against me.
You cannot save me.

Well, it's not the time to breakdown.
It's not the time to breakdown.
It's not the time to break up this love,
Keep it together now.
It's not the time to break.

Read it all, no need for separating here.
You see what you want and try to justify.
All your little lines,
Convictions and your lies.
What right do you have to point at me?

Well, I'm sitting alone thinking about it all over coffee.
And still crowdin' my space are the things you still hold against me.
You cannot save me.

Well, it's not the time to breakdown.

Okay cut the crap, I'm grown.
I don't gotta or should do nothing that involves you,
a sick twisted fate, with a dis-satisfying ending.

"All I'm trying to say is that I know what's happening..."
My heart is not your crutch,
I'm not you support giver,
I'm not your parent,

I'm barely your friend.

Follow your instincts fool.

"Go back to what you know...this is way too impossible".



-Ne-Yo, "Back to what you know"-

Part of me...Take 2

Everytime I choose not to say something, a part of me grows weak...

A part of me dies.

I let you get away with the worst kinds of things, and let it slide.

Part of me is resentful, part of me lies.

But part of me know that I'm not a fool,
and that I will not take this lightly,

Part of me knows your too freaking stupid to understand what I mean,

That part of me is unsightly......that ever lasting bind.

I know I can not change you, and I don't want to either.
But you takr me for granted...all parts of me.

And you made that mistake,

Part of me doesn't have to be kind.